It is hard to believe that we are 10 days into September. It seems like it both took forever to get here and that it came too quickly, and how it feels like both, I do not know.
Let’s be real. 2020 has been an incredibly long and challenging year. I do not think that there is anyone out there that can deny that. I am not sure how everyone else has been handling it, but I personally have been on a rollercoaster since March.
Being an introvert with anxiety and depression in a good year is hard. To be someone struggling with those issues this year is almost impossible. The depression and anger that permeates the greater sects of society make it incredibly difficult to keep your personal demons at bay.
I know that may sound dramatic, but I also know that you likely don’t struggle with your mental health routinely if you think it is dramatic. I know everyone has issues at times, but believe me, when I tell you the difference between a down day and being an anxious, depressed introvert is about the same as the difference between a rock and water.
Now, I have joked about how pandemic life is perfect for an introvert. But believe me… it’s not. First of all, even introverts have people they enjoy hanging with, and to have those few people taken from them it rocks their world. My world. Second, much as I love my wife and daughter…it has been a lot of family togetherness. A. Lot.
Where that is hard for an introvert is that we need time. We need time to retreat within ourselves and decompress. Amy and I have a group of friends that I adore. It is two other couples who have children around Riley’s age.
We call ourselves the Sinister Six, and we call our kids the Core Four. There are few people in the world and in my life ever that I have loved as much as I love these people. And the majority of those are in my family.
Now I love nothing more than spending time with the rest of the Sinister Six. We can literally get together at 10 AM and hang until 10 PM. As an introvert, this has never really been a huge thing I can do because social interaction is exhausting. It is less exhausting with these guys because they are easy. They are all the best people I know; they strive to make the world better, exude love, kindness, and acceptance.
Also, they respect my love of Marvel, obviously, and only slightly harass me for it. So, they stay for life.
I go into all this detail to show that as much as I love them and enjoy being with them, I get what I call introvert hangover and am exhausted and withdrawn the day after. It is not because I don’t love and enjoy them. It is because being an introvert is who I am, inside and out.
The pandemic took those people from me. It limited my time with my family, with whom I am incredibly close. It made my older sister a little COVID crazy (love you Jul, and yes, I know, insert Friends fist bump flip-off here). That just feeds the anxiety, the depression, and makes everything expand to epic proportions.
2020 didn’t just throw a global pandemic at us. It threw murder hornets, flying snakes, civil unrest, Australian wildfires, wildfires destroying the Western US as we speak, Trump…Trump…and more Trump, and so much more.
However, 2020 also gave me an actual writing career. Like, not just selling my soul to build my portfolio and giving people hours of work for $5 apiece, but a career. It gave me 5 Things That Happened While You Were Out over at CivMix. It gave me a job writing at ScreenRant, Bi-Coastal Babble, and some other B2B clients.
I have been lucky enough to continue with all three of them, though some of the posts have not gone up yet. And now, tomorrow, I am adding another site to my list when NerdzNewz launches.
I get to be a part of this site from the start, and I am grateful for that. 2020 gave me that. It has also taken so much.
So I am glad that we are here, double digits into September of this eternal, unrelenting year. As we wait to see how it closes out, I am both scared and excited.
I bet it is gonna be quite the ride. Onto Nov. 3.
And then Nov. 6. Cause no matter who wins the election, I am gonna need me some Black Widow. I miss the MCU…
Until next time, that is How I See It.